Left Behind

"They fuck you up, your mum and dad.  They don't mean to, but they do." Philip Larkin

Good old parents,
sending me to a secondary school,
where I was alone. Isolated.  Deserted.  Abandoned.
An insignificant fish in a sea of
sharks.

I was the epitome of outsider.
Everybody
laughing.
Screaming!  Endless noise
smothering my deaf ears.  Everyone else in their social
circles.  Closely K-N-I-T-T-E-D.
I felt like a piece of stray
wool.
Slowly unravelling, as I drifted from one group to
another.  Hoping for interaction.  Receiving neglection.

They knew I'd be alone.
They knew I'd have no friends.
They knew I'd be a wanderer.  A migrant.  An undesirable.
They knew.

It didn't stop them.

Everybody else.

Me.

The weight of the Others.
Suffocating.
Crushing.
Pushing
down
on
Me.

I remember.

*Author's Notes*

In this poem, I let out all of my teenage angst and edginess.  This was partly written for school and partly based of the awesome quotation.  I felt that freeverse would be more effective, for this type of poem.  It's been a while since I've experimented with structure like this.  I definitely resent my parents for doing this.  This is a bit of a rantish, moany type poem.  Not the best of my work, but I needed to express these emotions.